Success! I stuffed two bags full of winter clothes, got rid of three drawers full of clothes I don’t want anymore, chucked six pairs of shoes and… still have a bunch of stuff. I hate throwing things away. Many of my clothes are hand-me-downs from cousins and friends, or gifts, or inside jokes, and I just can’t throw that kind of stuff away. It’s too precious. Too good of a memory.

Mom and I have to have the house ready for visitors before Monday. Lara is coming on Monday and Ann-Kathrin a month after. Did you know!? Ann-Kathrin, my host sister from Germany, is going to be a foreign exchange student at my house this year! You have no idea how excited I am.

But before I can be too excited, we got to get everything ready. We have to take everything off my walls, get rid of the crap in the bathroom, buy a new shower lining, ya dee ya duh.

Micky called me from Europe today. It was a bittersweet phone call. We talked for an hour about his adventures, my hair, what’s happening when he gets back, college, and more. I’ve been ignoring his Facebook messages all week because I sense what’s going to happen after Europe and I don’t want to face it just yet. We talked about our relationship today. He knows it too. Our relationship is ending. It can’t work. I am a Capulet and he is a Montague.

But that didn’t change the flow of the conversation. We were still chatty and loud and silly. We read each other’s thoughts and finished the other’s sentences. We were in best friend mode again. I got off the phone and spent time with the family afterwards. But when I went back in my room to finish cleaning, I knelt on the floor and cried for a long time.

It is the right thing to do. We have our own desires and adventures to experience in the next couple of years. We both have beautiful lives ahead of us. I am honored that I had the opportunity to know such a wonderful person and spend so much of my time with him. If only you knew how amazing he is.

But even though it’s the right thing to do, it still sucks.

Good night!


  1. Have I ever told you that I love you? Because I do. And have I ever told you that I love to blog stalk you? Because I do. You make me smile and feel young.

  2. We forgot to tell you to tell Micky to take the train to Hallstatt and spend a night there. There’s a great youth hostel there and it’s just one of the most beautiful places in the world. (about four hours from Vienna on the train).

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