The minute spring hits Salt Lake City, the anxieties of thinking you live in the Truman Show suddenly vanish. The winter inversion does that to people–to me. It sucks the life and blinds us (me) from seeing any positive future outside of the dirty valley.

Then the rain falls.

And Salt Lake City becomes my favorite place in the world. Couples walk through Temple Square, horse carriages interrupt city traffic, tulips (oh, the tulips!) bloom in orange, yellow, red, purple, and pink. Business men crowd the train stations and Main Street. And with City Creek open, friends and families (and them hipsters) eat outside with lemonade and shopping bags.

Spencer and I walked down to Temple Square and sat next to the tulips. I wanted to shrink and run through the flowers, like Alice in Wonderland. I wanted to lie in the dirt and stare up at the sky with the flowers hovering over me. I wanted to hear birds chirping and gossipy conversations in the distance and maybe a roaring garbage truck, just to remember that I live in the city. Sitting with Spencer next to the tulips reminded me of a dream I had a year ago. In this dream I had the ability to control everything. I created waterfalls and willow trees and daisies and a cottage in the forest. And I wanted my family there. I wanted them to share it with me.

I have control over my life. I can do what I want. I can create the things I want. I can be who I want to be. AND I don’t have to be alone to do it. I can share my life with loved ones.

Happy day, all is well.


  1. It’s true. You can. And you will.

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