Hello, hello, hello! *Hugs, kisses, tear drops*
This may be the longest time I’ve abandoned my blog. What do you think?
I woke up wanting to tell virtual world how I’m feeling. One, I don’t think I’ve written because I’m not terrible. My innards aren’t burning, my head isn’t throbbing of anxiety–I’m fine. But every year seems to be this new, big thing in our lives. We’re over that. We don’t want new and crazy. We want consistency.
We’re back to the what-the-crap-are-we-doing phase. Spencer finished his bachelors in mining engineering (YAY!!!), which means we’re gonna get kicked out of our cinderblock home. People, I know we’ve been living in dark and dreary for four years, but the rent?! We’re looking at new places and we’re gonna have to pay at least $200 more dollars. Oh, and we’ve decided we need a two-bedroom. For our sanity.
I’m applying to business school. I’m taking the GMAT instead of the GRE because BYU only accepts the GMAT. I want to go to BYU because it’s like in the top 15 or something in the U.S. and it’s cheap and I think I’d like it. So I’m taking this GMAT prep course at the U right now. Maxwell has been helping me with the math. It is so freaking hard. I remember learning it, but I haven’t used this crap since sophomore year.
Spencer’s looking for a job. I know he’ll get something soon. He’s reliable and hardworking and his professors and co-workers and previous managers love him. I know it will work out, but that doesn’t mean I’m not a little nervous.
I’m still at the Global Service Center at the Church speaking to German leaders all day. I’m writing e-mails in Spanish too, along with Danish and Norwegian and Swedish. We have a new manager, who is really awesome, and I’m starting to do North America calls. I’ve never been more afraid to speak with Americans than with Germans. I know the European laws and the tax certificate issues and the money transfer issues and the data privacy issues, but the U.S.? No.
Anyway, I’m struggling with consistency. Why can’t I go to sleep at the same time and wake up and leave work at the same time and study my scriptures at the same time and wash the dishes and the laundry and dinner and breakfast and Church at the same time? Why is that so hard? I know I’m a really hard worker at my job. From the start to the end I’m working and fighting to learn more even when I’m hesitant. But once I’m home I don’t want to do anything. Anything.
Who is really good at this? I honestly can’t think of one person. Do you know someone? What do they do?
Anyway. I gotta go eat and drive to Murray to study for the GMAT. I’m not sure if this study group will as beneficial as sitting with Maxwell, but we’ll see. After studying, Spencer and I are going to look at an apartment, which we’ve pretty much decided we won’t take. But it has a poooooooooool.
Wishing you all the best.